Posted by Dennis on August 09, 2010 | 23 Comments »

Posted in: Homosexuality, Manhood

Another one of the topics pastors and churches would rather not preach in church because of its controversial nature but we can’t keep a blind eye on what’s happening in our culture today.

A friend of mine said that in one of the public schools in the Philippines they at least 4 out of 10 are homosexuals. How come nobody is talking about it except Rustom Padilla?

So here are my uncensored thoughts on homosexuality:

1. The church should never bash homosexuals. Christ has called us to love people – even homosexuals. Homosexuality should never be categorized as a special sin. A hot tempered man is a sinner, a glutton is a sinner, a sexual pervert is a sinner. Don’t think that homosexuality is a SIN of its own. We must love homosexuals and lovingly confront and help them.

2. Most of my homosexual friends have a troubled past. Some people are homophobic because they never heard the story. I was such in the past but when I started hearing the stories of my friends it breaks my heart. I received a phone call years ago from a close friend who recounted to me how his dad played him. I was in tears after the conversation and could only utter “God why would anybody do that to his own son?” The roles of the father is very crucial. Manhood is imparted by the Fathers. We are living in a fatherless generation. There is no true model of biblical manhood so don’t expect to see MEN to act like real MEN if nobody is going to impart it to them. I recommend for every man to read “WILD AT HEART” to fully understand what I am blogging here. Dads, it is time to step it up and be like real men and father our kids. If you are struggling with homosexuality, it would be great if you surround yourself with godly men who can help you and coach you spiritually, emotionally and physically.

3. Homosexuality is a SIN. I know this might offend some of you but I have to clearly paint what the Bible says. Nobody is born a homosexual. No baby comes out of the womb and cries Uh- wah, uh wah. Homosexuality is a choice. As much as a traumatic past can be a good reason to be homosexual it does not excuse us from choosing not to be. A good friend of mine who is now courting a girl admitted in the past that he had this tendency to be attracted to the same sex because when he was young his uncle molested him but it did not became an excuse for him to practice homosexuality. By God’s grace, he made a decision to be a MAN because God made him one.

4. Don’t believe the lies. Once a homosexual, will always be one or it’s in my genes. No conclusive study has been made about this. The Bible is clear. Hope can be found in Jesus. Don’t think your sin is too big to overcome. You have a story to tell. A story of hope and restoration. A story that Jesus can make you be the MAN you ought to be.


Dennis Sy is the editor in chief of Act Like a Man and the Senior Pastor of Victory Greenhills. Husband to Thammie Sy, and father to three wonderful kids. You can follow his tweets @DennisSy or follow him in Facebook. Dennis is also the author of the best selling book, " Rich for Life: Secrets of Those Who Stayed Rich for Life and How You Can be One

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23 Comments on “Homosexual”

  1. 1 patricia said at 1:34 am on August 9th, 2010:

    Same goes for women. Homosexuality is prevalent in women as well because 1 in every 3 women are abused and they end up having a twisted view of receiving a man’s love.

    I know because I was once before. Thank God He can free us from any sin.

  2. 2 Neil said at 3:34 pm on June 4th, 2011:

    Yep. I’m gay and I’m really glad I found God. I’m still struggling but I know that with Him, I can go through this. I’m fighting it step by step. :)

  3. 3 Dennis said at 5:16 pm on June 4th, 2011:

    @neil, thanks for your courage. I pray that you live your life by the grace of God.

  4. 4 Janelle said at 2:16 pm on September 4th, 2011:


    Your answers have been very anointed, insightful and full of God’s gracious wisdom. I really pray we will all have more compassion and love for those who may struggle with this in life. May we always look at others the same way Jesus looks at us. Another awesome post, Pastor D!

  5. 5 Phil said at 3:33 pm on September 23rd, 2011:

    I want to quote a statement from your post ” If you are struggling with homosexuality, it would be great if you surround yourself with godly men who can help you and coach you spiritually, emotionally and physically.” Yes, this is definitely true. Since I was invited to attend a cell group meeting of Victory members last year, my life started to change and also my perspective to being homosexual. I have this roommate who take initiative to involve me to that meeting, and during that time also I have a desire to change. Kung baga sakto ang lahat. It was planned for me to witness a new life with him. I revealed everything to my roommate and he understand. he coach me spiritually and give me advises how to resist the enemy. I just pray that other homosexuals also find its way to Jesus and to salvation. Im now in the process of total conversion. Its not easy but its possible because with God anything is possible.

  6. 6 elmer said at 8:56 am on October 31st, 2011:

    This is also my struggle, I asked for help from my church but my pastor has lately been busy attending church stuff so I don’t have anyone to talk to about this. I don’t know what to do next.

  7. 7 Beth said at 8:14 pm on December 4th, 2011:

    Will repost this pastor, so that many people will be able to see this! Will give credits! Thanks so much for this! So relevant!! :D

  8. 8 Macy said at 1:40 pm on February 7th, 2012:

    I find this very offensive, and WRONG. I think anyone who does not walk in our shoes should never talk about something you have no idea of.. you dont know how its like to walk in my shoes, and on top of that having people like yourself attempting to tell me how to feel, what to do, what I am. You are no better than other people attacking us homosexuals “without understanding them”. YOu are the same. You attack without understanding. You think its relevant to you because your friend is gay and that gives you permission? Let me tell you one thing. Attraction is not a choice.. let alone love. Love is not a choice for you, your wife and your congregation.. You contradict yourself by saying we cannot help but feel attracted to the same-sex because we were abused by a parent of the same-sex. Yet you say we CHOOSE to be Gay? We do not love because we were abused when we were kids.. does that even make sense to you? Lets put it this way.. I guess you are straight because the appropriate parent abused you? do you see how idiotic that sounds? Its not a choice, its never a choice. If loving someone was a choice there’ll be less heartaches, breakups, and all the nasties associated with loving another. Keep your thoughts and judgements to yourself.. as you said so yourself we are not one to judge. That is for God to decide.

  9. 9 Dennis said at 1:59 pm on February 7th, 2012:

    @macy, approving your comment though I dont totally agree. Sorry if you find my entry offensive. I never claim to know how homosexuals feel but I would be the last to judge a homosexual. I have a lot of homosexual friends and we live in harmony not because I look down on them. I think that is the problem. We can’t treat homosexual as a special sin. http://www.actlikeaman.org/act-man-bashing-gays/

  10. 10 Jun said at 3:46 pm on February 9th, 2012:

    @macy, everytime we wake up in the morning, maybe before or after our quiet time, we are always reminded by God of our identity, our “manhood” or i say our “pagkalalake”. It is a good thing God designed us this way, He put it at the front of our body and not at the back or below us. I have a friend who was like you before and i could say he was more worst because he told us he was involved into homosexual activity, but when he met Jesus Christ, he was enlightened to what the original design of God has given to him. Now he is engaged and to be married. To God be the Glory…

  11. 11 ice said at 10:02 am on February 28th, 2012:

    I know you said its in the bible which part is that, just curious… can you tell where i can read it.

  12. 12 ice said at 10:20 am on February 28th, 2012:

    This blog reminds me why i didnt go back to the preacher who preach the same thing. im very iffended for the sake of my friends. This one is a different form of hatred and brainwashing. i dont know if im defending the wrong people but it my gut im right. Love is love jesuss teaches us to love but he didt tell who we can love right it means we are free to love anyone not just based on others right or wrong im with you mact. forgot to tell im straight O:-)

  13. 13 Dennis said at 11:41 am on February 28th, 2012:


    Romans 1:26-27 – “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.” (NIV)

    1 Corinthians 6:9-10 – “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.” (NIV).

    Leviticus 20:13 – “If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.” (NIV)

  14. 14 Dennis said at 11:43 am on February 28th, 2012:

    @ice it is okay that we have differing stands on things but thank you for sharing your thoughts, really appreciate it.

  15. 15 Baby said at 9:40 pm on April 21st, 2012:

    I am a little confused on how some readers can blame this writer (Dennis) of being offensive, when he is only quoting the bible. There appears to be displaced anger towards Dennis. You should take up your concerns with the author of the Bible, who by the way, loves you. Everyday is a challenge for most people. Pick-up your cross and follow Him, then you can find peace. That was easy to write, but I realize it’s hard to do; nevertheless, I think it’s possible.

  16. 16 Manhood and Gays | Act Like a Man said at 9:02 pm on May 11th, 2012:

    […] I am a Christian and I believe in the biblical worldview. I have seen videos from talk shows, famous celebrities and even the president of the United States saying gay is ok. So I won’t argue on my stand and my case. I think you know where I stand. […]

  17. 17 timothy said at 9:40 pm on May 12th, 2012:

    homosexuality runs in my family. an uncle, a bisexual aunt and a lesbian one, a niece, and a nephew. when they ask me what the Bible says about homosexuality I tell them what the Bible says, no ifs, buts, and two ways.
    yet they know I love them.
    my lesbian aunt (now deceased) sees the long scar on my right forearm and she knows I love her despite my being upfront to her about what the Bible says of her lifestyle, and my own disapproval.
    I’d give my life for her.
    the heckler who wielded the weapon found that out, the hard way.
    We had a homosexual neighbor who was the sweetest, most considerate person I’ve known.
    But it is what it is.
    Only God can work on them to will and to do of His good pleasure, and they, like Pharaoh, are allowed to exist for His glory and to show His power when it is the right time for Him, and it falls within His will, to do so.
    There were ex-sodomites in the Corinthian church, the Bible points out.
    God did not make one a homo and another straight and another bisexual, these are parts and parcels of man’s fallen nature. We are fallen creatures, all of us, Christians or not and any Christian who points a finger at another sinner in his sins should remember that three fingers are pointing right back at him and he should think: “there but for the grace of God, go I”.
    If I were pastoring, would I welcome a homo, a practicing homo, in church ?
    By all means, yes, even all the way to the usual church after-service lunch fellowship.
    Would the same practicing homo be welcome INTO church ?
    Church membership is for those who have experienced grace and surrendered to Christ, who are ready to abide by what the church believes and stands for, and to live a life consecrated to the service of God.
    As Paul wrote to the Corinthian ex-sodomites: “and such WERE some of you, BUT ye are washed, BUT ye are sanctified….”

  18. 18 Ijon Lance said at 12:32 pm on October 6th, 2012:

    I admit that I´m struggling with that.It´s true that they have troubled past.I´m often bullied by my male classmates in HS physically,emotionally and even socially on facbeook.My brother used to recall my past mistakes in HS and at that time,parang lumalayo ako sa mga grupo or mga barkada kahit sa church.I used to believe that I was gay just because people say,that´s what they see about me.But despite all that,I really want to live a normal life.I´m so tired of believing in a LIE that I´m a homosexual.I´m so tired of gratifying my sinful nature (including masturbating,watching porn gay websites,CosmoMen mags etc.).I really desired to live a normal life.

    I remember last Saturday of February this year 2012,I was dreaming that I was crying,weeping,sobbing saying “Lord,please forgive me.´´and all I can see is all White.It´s like God wants me to give up this kind of Homosexual struggle.And as of now,I´m still struggling with it,hoping for this bondage to be broken once and for all. I know God already forgave me but it doesn´t mean I should stay like this all of my life.I´m still on this process of male acceptance or wholeness.I´m boasting all of my struggles/weakness that his spirit may rest upon me.For when I am weak,then I am strong.Please pray for me.I´m willing to give up or cry out with all of my heart only just for him.To Go Be The Glory.

  19. 19 Zachaeus said at 11:14 am on October 23rd, 2012:

    Eto na ung conflict. When the “truth” that comes from the word of God is preached, we tend to “disapprove” kasi it’s against our own perspective-the standard of the world that we live. But the truth is, we need to be free from these blinders na sinasabi ng mundo na “normal lang”. Hindi lang about the issue of homosexuality but other standards pag dating sa sex, how we live our lives, religion etc. If you feel that you are being condemned about it, guys wake up! These people like Ptr. Dennis cares for you! Like what Jesus did two thousand years ago, He preached God’s love to all us and proved it by dying on the cross. I don’t wanna sound religious because I’m not. But i believe it’s the right time to stand and fight for conviction. We can’t watch this world slowly deteriorating because of the “wrong standard” many people are in-prisoned with. Again, I’m not here to ransack anyone, but to tell the world my conviction and standard that should guide us- THE WORD OF GOD.

  20. 20 Rick said at 10:13 am on December 15th, 2012:

    Hi Pastor Dennis,
    I just want to add the message of hope of the 1st Corinthians Bible verse you quoted by reading further to verse 11.

    1 Corinthians 6:9-11 New International Version (NIV)
    9 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor MEN WHO HAVE SEX WITH MEN 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

    11 AND THAT IS WHAT SOME OF YOU WERE. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

    In Tagalog “Ganyan ang ilan sa inyo dati” Some Corinthian Christians we’re gays as well but with God’s grace and blessing they we’re able to correct their sin.

    They can also check out the story of former gay Stephen Bennett who has a wife and kids now.


  21. 21 Geoff said at 11:48 am on March 7th, 2013:

    Hello Dennis,

    You have indeed put a lot of your thoughts into your article. I am gay and I understand why some of your readers felt offended by this article. Personally, what I felt is sadness. Sad because your article implies that homosexuals are sinners. Sad because you are condescending towards us, stating that we need your help. And most of all sad because you thought we CHOSE to be homosexuals, thus we chose to sin.

    Let me ask you, would you CHOOSE to be someone who will be discriminated against in this world? Would you CHOOSE to be someone who will be condemned by your own family and friends? Would you CHOOSE to be someone who are often frowned upon by people from their own faith?

    If homosexuality is a choice, would you be able to CHOOSE at your own right now, to be a homosexual?

    The fact that you mentioned that we chose to be gays, just proves that fact that you have very limited understanding of our situation, contrary to what you say. I respect you, and we share the same faith in God. But you don’t seem to know much about the very people you are writing about.

  22. 22 Dennis said at 3:55 pm on March 7th, 2013:

    Hi geoff,

    Thanks for replying with grace and kindness even though our views are different. I just want to say that all homosexuals and heterosexuals are sinners. I think all of us need Christ. Homosexuality is not a special sin/state. I think all your statements are true whether we are homosexuals or not. I even think the issue is not homosexuality but how we sin against a Holy God but He still choose to love us.

    We are all discriminated. Even my stand on some issues are being cruelly questioned without the benefit of a doubt. We will always be condemned and frowned upon – that is what sin does. So whether homosexual or not, it doesn’t really matter – we are all sinners in need of the grace of God.

    Again, thank you for being so kind. Glad to have someone with a good heart who can agree to disagree.


  23. 23 DOEsnt matter said at 12:36 am on March 13th, 2013:

    I am a homosexual male and i havent had any traumatic experiences with a father figure. I am also a Christian and believe got to be my Lord and Savior. Also, I will add that when a baby comes out, they do not have sexual attraction. Their desire for sex isn’t developed until their pre-teen years, so, that argument is invalid. A baby is not born straight OR gay. They are born asexual without a desire for reproductive acts. I cannot recall a single day that I have wanted to have sex with a woman. I didn’t decide one day “Hey, im gonna be a homosexual male and have my Christian friends and many straight men chastise and turn their backs on me for my preference,” It was something that just was. And lastly, I know that Jesus loves me. Its also true that no sin is worse than another. Sin is sin. I reiterate that Jesus is my lord and savior. I love him, he loves me. I feel no remorse for being gay, and I’m sure that the Lord is proud of me not occulting who I am in the face of such misguided and ignorant Christians that I see conversing on this weblog. God bless.

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